(Although a seemingly angry outburst of a title it will make much more sense at the end.)
Mental health awareness day was a frustrating wheel of chaos and confusion. For every personal experience or thoughtful shared post I saw ones calling out these as vacuous, unsympathetic and attention seeking as opposed to truly caring.
For every person I saw find a platform to give a tiny part of themselves to the ether in attempt to feel less alone, I saw people who also have serious conditions not say a word and remain in the background.
I took all sides on board as I realise that even though the world has a certain constant or pattern to it, the people inhabiting it are somewhat less predictable.
My conclusion came at 11.30pm whilst listening to the rain outside my window, washing away the day.
BE EXCELLENT TO EACHOTHER.
Bill & Ted, 1989 with one very simple ideal for life and yet 29 years later we are still being predominantly anything but.
We have gone from
“if you don’t have anything nice to say to..” to
” you have the right to say anything you want.” to “you can’t say that” and finally to the point where even if you try to say something nice you will have thousands of faceless people ready to rip you apart for even attempting the aforementioned Excellence.”
CAN WE ALL JUST LAY OFF EACHOTHER?
It’s utterly exhausting watching this wierd life competition.
If you are my friend it’s because I consider you to be the owner of awesome qualities. I’m not friends with people who enjoy other peoples misery. You are all so different and creative and have your own light to shine and yet I see you constantly battling to be the best, look the best, have the cleverest kids, have the biggest/cleanest house, the happiest relationship, the best car, the best phone or the most expensive holiday.
NONE of that matters to me if it DOESN’T bring you happiness. I just want all of you beautiful souls to be happy and healthy.
My friend Louise shared a meme which hit a chord with me as I see it so often online and I feel sad that it’s an every day occurrence.
“Life is the most difficult exam.
Many people fail because they try to copy others, not realising that everyone has a different question paper.”
The only common denominator between you all is that you have good hearts. Besides that you are all travelling a separate and very unique journey. No matter how incredible yours is it isn’t necessarily transferable, in whole or in part to anyone else you know, no matter how alike they may seem.
So don’t copy my answers or even try to answer my questions for me. We are both on different paths and friends want each other to succeed, so we need to be cheerleaders to one another instead of back seat drivers.
Instead of asking me or any of your friends next time you see them “when you having kids?” or “when are you getting married?” or “when are you getting a Better job?” how about just asking how the other person is and not accepting ‘fine’ or ‘okay’ as their full answer?
Let’s just all be excellent to eachother.